


Love the way you lie

by Elenduen



Category: The Musketeers (2014), d'Artagnan Romances (Three Musketeers Series) - All Media Types
Genre: BDSM Universe, Failing to use safety word, M/M, Mpreg, Past Abuse, Trigger Warning miscarriage, dub/con, kink meme fill, rape/non con
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-21
Updated: 2015-02-21
Packaged: 2018-03-14 10:50:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,817
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3407825
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Elenduen/pseuds/Elenduen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Set in a BDSM au </p><p>D`Artagnan is a sub running from a forced marriage back in Gascony to a Dominant who brutalized him.</p><p>Eventually he finds his way to Paris and into the arms of three new dominants Athos, Aramis, and Porthos.</p><p>Having been all but a slave before, he finds his new dominants perfect, but is still traumatized by his past abuse, and does not understand the use of safety words or knows anything about a Subs true rights.</p><p>So when he breaks a rule and is brutally punished for it, the result is catastrophic for his relationships and mental health</p>
            </blockquote>





	Love the way you lie

**Author's Note:**

> Written for this Prompt on the Kink memeBDSM Universe, O4, punishment, misunderstandings, failure to safe word;  
> Date: 2014-05-30 10:18 pm (UTC)  
> From: (Anonymous)  
> past abuse, mental health issues, angst, like HEAVY angst
> 
> Weew, there's a lot of warnings on this one. If I have forgotten anything, I apologize.
> 
> D'Artagnan is the only Submissive in a relationship with three Dominants, Athos, Porthos and Aramis. They met by pure chance, after D'Artagnan ran away to Paris from his abusive Dominant, which he was married off to when he was only 16.  
> His earlier Dominant never had a kind word for him, locked him up, beat him if D'Artagnan in any way failed his instructions, raped him, you name it. In the end D'Artagnan made the decision that everything would be better than this, and made a run for it. In Paris he met the Musketeers, and gradually stuck up a friendship with them and came to trust them, and this evolved into love and they bonded.
> 
> Okay, enough backstory, now to the actual prompt:  
> Because of his past, D'Artagnan don't really understand boundaries, or that he is supposed to have limits and that he can say no or make objections. To him, a bond between a Dom and a Sub is a one way street, where the Dom commands and the Sub obeys. The mere idea to talk back to a Dominant won't even cross his mind, ever, even if something scare him or hurt him. He had never heard of a safe word before he bonded with Athos, Aramis and Porthos, and even then he couldn't grasp the idea of stopping them. Because, a Dom can do anything with a Sub, and the Sub have to take it. Period.
> 
> But despise these issues they are having a good life together, and D'Artagnan is for the first time in his life genuinely happy. He want to show his Doms how grateful and happy he is, so he decides to make a surprise for them by cooking them their favorite meal (during his forced marriage he was a house slave, so he became a very good cook). But this is supposed to be a surprise, so he brakes one of the core rules his Doms gave to him: Never go out without telling where he is going.  
> So D'Artagnan goes out, getting the supplies he'll be needing, and heads back towards home. But on the way he run into some tugs, that decides it will be very fun to beat up an unaccompanied Sub.  
> They leave him unconscious in a side alley, and when D'Artagnan at long lasts awake, it is already dark. He finds his way back home, only to be met by three very worried and angry Doms. All of his supplies was lost, so D'Artagnan decides not to mention why he went out. There won't be any surprise now, anyway.  
> This leads to the heaviest punishment they have ever given D'Artagnan. D'Artagnan takes it without complaint and without a word, but as it drags out it becomes harder and harder to stay focused on where he is and who he is with, and D'Artagnan ends up in a shaking, terrified mess. Calling out the safe word never enters his mind. His Dominants want him to feel pain, so he will feel it. He did something wrong, so he must face the consequences.  
> But after this punishment, D'Artagnan changes. He is more of a shadow than a person now, doing everything in his power not to upset his Doms in any way, and not to give them any reason to punish him again.  
> By a coincident, Athos finds out what D'Artagnan was doing the day he went out and was beaten up, and when he speaks to him, finally learns that D'Artagnan hadn't tried to purposely brake any of their rules, but that he was trying to do something nice. When Athos asks why D'Artagnan didn't say anything, D'Artagnan just answers that it didn't make any difference.  
> Que lots of comfort and loving and a long talk about limits and that they fully expect their Sub to explain fully any situation that might arise.

It did`nt seem to matter how long it had been since he had left Gascony, how long he had been free from Robert, his time there still haunted him, the pain, the misery, the loss.  
Yes the loss, that was the one thing that d`Artagnan would never forget, never get over.  
When he slept, safe and warm in the comforting protective arms of his new Dominants he would still lay there dreaming remembering the feel of large fists smashing into his face, braking his nose, knocking out teeth, booted feet kicking his thighs, his back, his middle, leaving him sprawled across the floor coughing and moaning in pain, the searing pain of a belt being lashed across his back, a riding crop against his backside, and that one horrific heart braking moment when he had felt blood coating his thighs, a searing agonising pain in his belly, as his baby had died and slid out of his body.

Time and again d`Artagnan would awaken half burried beneath Porthos, Aramis, and Athos, coated in a cold sweat with tears on his cheeks as he relived his miscarriage and brutality at the hands of his ex dominant husband Robert d`Favroux.

He had been married off to Robert, a wealthy land owner back in Gascony, known for being an arrogant foul tempered brute.  
D`Artagnan had been just sixteen to Robert`s thirty, his Father, having no time or use for a Submissive beyond marrying him off had swiftly paid over a dowry and d`Artagnan had been speedily wed and possessed by Robert.

From the very first day his life had become a constant grind of pain and misery.  
Robert did not allow him to go out at all save to church and only then when he was with him, as the man could not be bothered to have servents beyond a couple of stable hands, d`Artagnan was expected to see to the whole house, which was not small, he had to clean it from top to bottom every single day, scrub the walls and floors still they shone, polish every surface, clean every window, wash all the clothes and have them aired and spotless, cook three meals for Robert, and be ready to submit to him at any time he demanded.

He was not permitted to sleep in Roberts bed, Robert did not believe a submissive was worthy of a bed.  
Instead he was made to sleep at the foot of the bed on the floor, with nothing but his night shift to keep himself warm.

If he failed in any of his duties, sometimes even if he did not, then he would be beaten and thrown into the cellar beneath the stairs, a seven foot by six foot cramped airless space where he would be forced to remain for hours in the dark, his bladder bursting and body aching from pain until Robert saw fit to let him out.  
It had been in that cellar that he had miscarried the baby, collasping on the floor screaming and begging for help as his baby had been torn from his body.

When Robert had finally come for him hours later he had found d`Artagnan unconscious in a pool of blood, not even bothering to call a physician for him he had thrown a bucket of water over d`Artagnan to rouse him and had him clean up the blood before cooking him a meal uncaring of the pain d`Artagnan was in or the fact he could have easily become very ill.

That had been nearly a year ago, a year when d`Artagnan had plucked up enough courage to run away from Robert and from Gascony, making his way to Paris, working odd jobs in taverns for a room and meal along the way, which was how he became entangled with the Musketeers and subsequently met his new dominants.

While at one tavern, a band of Red Guards posing as Musketeers had attacked and killed two of the guests, d`Artagnan had gone to Paris to seek justice and ended up saving the life of one of the Musketeers Athos when the Red Guards were exposed.  
After impressing them with his sword skills, d`Artagnan had become an apprentice Musketeer and finally a full Musketeer, exposing the Cardinals plans to assassinate the Queen, and exposed and dealt with Athos ex wife Milady.

While he had been reluctant at first to trust any dominant or to form any kind of relationship with the three inseperables, d`Artagnan had slowly fallen in love with them and a relationship had formed and grown, he becoming their submissive, moving into their shared house not far from the garrison.

The first thing that had shocked him was that he was allowed to sleep in their bed, not on the floor, and was allowed to go out where he pleased so long as he told them where he was going and when, could continue his duties as a Musketeer, and was treated no differently by them.  
Well no that was`nt true, he was treated differently, he was treated with complete adoration and such affection it made his heart melt with love.

He was happy to take care of the house for them, see to their meals and clothes, wanting so to please them for the delicious love and kindness they showed him.  
Spending hours kissing his and stroking his hair, making love to him with the up most tenderness, not simply pining him down and mounting him like a bitch when the urge took them.

Even the punishments he received if he broke a rule were lenient, or in his opinion they were, a few slaps across the backside by Athos palm, or a stinging slap of a cane across his wrists by Porthos, or made to kneel in a corner and learn a fitting passage from the Bible by Aramis.  
Nothing that ever brought him to tears or had him feeling broken and useless, just contrite and eager to please once more, and his dominants would happily hear his apology and promise not to transgress again, and bring him back into their loving arms to pet and kiss him.

So on the mornings he awoke with tears in his eyes he would hurriedly wipe them away and squirm out from his dominants embraces to go and wash off in cold water and get hot water ready for them to wash in and start on breakfast before they arose.

Aramis was usually the first to awaken, hard and horny, he would stumble from the bed, stark naked and make his way down to the kitchen where d`Artagnan would be cooking bacon sausages and eggs in a pan, bread sliced butter set out, ale being warmed on the harth all ready for them.

D`Artagnan grew very use to Aramis arrival in the kitchen, strong arms wrapping about his waist and heated kissess being pressed into his neck as Aramis rutted against him, swiftly spilling himself and tousling d`Artagnan`s hair before sauntering away to wash off always telling d`Artagnan not to worry about the cum on the floor, but d`Artagnan always cleaned it up anyway, listerning with amusment as Athos and Porthos rose and the playfull fight that would occur between the three dominants at who got to use the tub first and who got the fluffiest towel before they came down to the kitchen where breakfast would be ready and waiting for them.

"You are an absalute angel lad!" Porthos declared sitting down and pulling d`Artagnan onto his lap kissing the back of his neck "Heavon sent!"  
"If only we could house train Aramis everything would be perfect!" Athos grunted sour at being the last to use the water and that he`d had to pick up the wet towels left by Porthos and Aramis!  
"I`m not a bloody dog!" Aramis cried throwing a peice of bread at Athos  
"You`re like a bitch in heat!" Porthos chortled "Always looking to get humped!"  
"Blow me!" Aramis leered  
"Nah, I think I`ll leave that to our resident darling here!" Porthos grinned slapping d`Artagnans thigh with one hand while feeding him a strip of bacon with the other "Lips and tongue like crushed velvet!"  
"More like silk!" Athos grinned reaching over to stroke d`Artagnan`s hair making the Gascon mewl and lean into his touch turning his face to kiss the mans calloused palm  
"What time does Treville want us?" Pothos asked  
"In an hour" Athos replied "Palace duty"  
"Great, standing around doing nothing for hours, bored, stiff, and in full uniform" Porthos grunted rolling his eyes "Bad as parade!"  
"You`ve got the day off hav`nt you sweetheart?" Aramis asked d`Artagnan who nodded happily, a plan already forming in his mind to do something special for his Dominants, to show how much he loved them and make up for the boring duty they had today  
"Any plans for today then?" Athos asked  
"Nothing much" d`Artagnan lied, knowing it was wrong to lie, but it was a white lie and it was for a very good reason anyway,  
"Well you can think kindly of us while we`re slaving away at the palace for hours on end, and great us with nothing but your bare skin when we arrive home tonight!" Aramis declared "God knows I`ll be more than needing a pair of firm thighs and a rounded arse to make up for day!".

D`Artagnan set off for the market as soon as his Doms had departed for their long and reviled palace guard duty.

A wicker basket slung over one elbow and a cheerfull smile on his face he walked through the filth filled cobbled roads of Paris making his way to the loud and bustling market place.  
Firstly he went to the butchers stall to get a freshly killed and plucked chicken, not even bothering to haggle the price with the butcher and simply handing over the ten sous he demanded, which led to the butcher softening and throwing in a couple of rashers of bacon with a wink!.  
Next he went to the bakers to get some fresh bread, hard crusty rolls that would be perfect to go with the meal he planning.

Here he ran into Constance who was out shopping herself, and had just bought two fresh loaves  
"What are you doing out on your own?" she asked curriously and with a dimpled smiled "I thought you never went anywhere without one of those Doms of yours, got them wrapped about your little finger you do!"  
"Oh hush!" d`Artagnan protested "I`m buying supplies, I`m going to make a surprise meal for them tonight"  
"Oh someones birthday?" Constance asked  
"No, just..............something nice for them" d`Artagnan said with a shrug "I`m going to make fresh onion soup with bree, coq au vin, and creme brulee"  
"Mon Dieu! and you say this is`nt for a birthday!?" Constance exclaimed thinking of the hours of work d`Artagnan would have ahead of him getting this together  
"I hope they know how lucky they are" she said eyeing d`Artagnan who shrugged "I`m the lucky one" he replied kissing her cheek "Really lucky, and they deserve to be shown how much I love them".

After bidding good buy to Constance d`Artagnan finished buying everything he needed, along with a couple of bottles of wine, a cheap one for cooking with and some more expensive ones to drink, he set off back to the house his arm straining under the weight of the now heavily laden basket.

Perhaps it was because he was so preoccupied, perhaps because he had forgotten to take his sword out with him, perhaps it was just because he was Sub and they were Doms that the street gang chose to attack him as he turned onto one of the many side street allyways.

Whatever the reason, d`Artagnan did not have a chance to fight back, a searing blow to the back of the head had him dropping to his knees his vision blurring and head spinning, a punch to his face split his lip and a boot to his stomach had him retching as he fell face first onto the filthy ground his wares falling out of the basket around him.

The jeers, taunts, and laughter of the gang became a blurr as they continued to kick and punch him, his while body becoming a awash in a mass of pain as if he were being consumed by fire!, it was when a boot connected with the back of his head that he fell unconscious and remained sprawled in a crumpled bloody heap as the gang took what money he had left and all the food and wine he had bought.

By the time d`Artagnan regained his senses the streets of Paris were quiet and the sky dark showing he`d been unconscious nearly the whole day!.

Groaning he pushed himself to his feet releaved that nothing appeared to be broken save perhaps some ribs, though he knew he was covered in bruises, a wave of dizziness came over him as he stood and he had to put his hands on his knees to steady himself, had there been anything in his belly he would have vomited.

Taking a few calming breaths he pushed himself up and began to slowly walk back to the house, his body feeling more exhausted than when he`d been on duty all day, his head absalutly throbbing with pain still and to his shame his breeches damp and smelling of urine showing he`d released his bladder during the attack.

A few tears pricked his eyes at the loss of the food and his plans for such a romantic and special evening with his Doms, but he kept from crying, simply kept himself walking home desperate now to reach his Doms, to be comforted, to have them hold him and make him feel safe and loved once again.  
They would be furrious, that he knew, they would want to hunt this gang down and rip them apart, but knowing how much they cared for him, how much they loved him made him feel warm inside and eager to get back to them.

He could not be sure of what he expected when he opened the kitchen door and walked into the house, shouting perhaps, crys of horror, joyous releif at his return.  
But the stony silence he was greeted with unnerved him more than shouting ever could as did the three cold hard gazes of his Dominants who looked at him as if he had just commited Treason against the King.

It was Aramis who spoke first and who rose from the stool "You lied to us", his voice was cold as ice and as hard a solid steal making d`Artagnan`s heart skip a beat with a growing twist of fear  
"You said you would not be going out, said you`d stay in today" Aramis went on approaching d`Artagnan like a cat does a mouse, "Do you have any idea how worried we have been?, how much you`ve hurt us by this deception?"  
"I`m so....."  
"Silence!" Pothos barked his fist hitting the table in a deafening thump that made d`Artagnan jump and cower "You do not get to speak, not yet", here Athos rose from his seat his eyes so cold, face utterly devoid of emotion making d`Artagnan feel terrible, and very scared  
"He`s hurt Aramis, treat his wounds first" Athos said primly "Then we`ll begin the punishment"  
"Punishment?" d`Artagnan whispered only to yelp as his ear was cuffed by Aramis who grabbed his wrist to lead him to the bathroom "No talking!, or you`ll be gagged!".

D`Artagnan bit his lip his head down as he followed after Aramis his mind running over what punishment they would have in mind, could it be as bad as anything his ex had done to him?, no surely not, they`d proberly spank him, refuse to let him speak for a few hours and then that would be that, he could beg forgiveness and explain himself and everything would be fine, would`nt it?.

He could not have been more wrong if he had called The Cardinal as pure as the Virgin Mary!.

After Aramis had bound his wrists, cleaned every cut and bruise, d`Artagnan was made to strip naked and led into the bedroom where Porthos and Athos were waiting, as soon as he saw what was waiting for him d`Artagnan felt his heart sink down from his chest to his feet, a cold sweat of fear breaking out over his skin.

Ropes were secured to iron hooks that had been screwed into the walls, thick strong ropes that would bear his weight, a cat of nine tails lay waiting on the bed which had been pushed aside for a wooden bench to be set up at waist height before him, a switch was also present, along with what looked to be table salt and alcohol, metal clamps that d`Artagnan did`nt want to even think about, and worst of all a thick leather collar with sharp metal studs each side waiting to go about his neck and a matching genital pouch  
He was shaking like a leaf, and his legs were turned to jelly as the three doms advanced on him, the collar came on first scratching his throat painfully, next the pouch which tied about his waist with two strings down his buttocks to hold the tight pouch in place the sharp studs poking and scratching his most sensative skin making d`Artagnan`s whimper in pain.

The ropes came next as he was bent face first over the bench, the ropes secured to his anckles and wrists holding him in place, Porthos pulled them tight, so tight d`Artagnan heard himself giving a cry of pain as his joints were pulled  
"Feel free to scream, we won`t stop that" Athos said taking up the cat, d`Artagnan looked at him frightend eyes wide and lip being bitten through, however he let out a cry of distress as suddenly his left nipple was painfully clamped by Aramis who was brandishing the clamps, next his right nipple and to d`Artagnan`s horror the Musketeer stroked his painfull gentiles fondling for his balls making the spikes dig in and bruise if not draw blood!, the scream he gave out as the clamps were attached to his balls made his own ears ring without what it did to the others  
"You`ll not forget this lesson in a hurry!" Porthos growled slapping d`Artagnan`s bare arse making him yelp once more and struggle to keep his head up, somewhere in his mind the safety word, the word they had picked months ago lingered, dimly d`Artagnan thought about it, Clementia the latin word for mercy or so Athos had said, if he said it then that was it the dominance would stop, however right now, in the midst of this, with Athos brandishing the cat his mind went blank his mouth unable to form any words at all and with the swish of the cat and crack against flesh all he could do was scream.

Tears ran down d`Artagnan`s cheeks as his backside and back were brutally lashed, the cat seemed to not only slice open his skin but burn it aswell as if it were made of flame, and when joined by the biting sting of the switch that Aramis swiped him with d`Artagnan gave up thought completely.

Pain, and misery, the only two things in his life he had known would always be with him, perhaps he had gotten a short reprieve but now things were clearly back to normal.

'You are worthless!, a stupid useless whore!, even a dog is of more value than you are!' d`Artagnan whimpered soundlessly as he heard Roberts voice in his head, felt Roberts hands on him, felt the beatings, the collar about his throat bit into his skin as he strained breathing heavily, his body trembling all over and limbs tugging at the ropes that kept him suspended digging into his wrists and anckles leaving livid red welts.  
'I`ll teach you some respect you little slut', slap slap, punch punch, blood and tears, 'God knows why God stuck me with you!, I`d have done better with a half witted slave!' a kick in the ribs, a belt across his back, thrown down the stairs, kicked in the belly 'Rot in your filth you pathetic whelp!, no one will miss you!, no one will care if you wither and die!, you should die!, stop wasting air and space on your worthless existance!'.

D`Artagnan cried out as salt was tipped onto the open welts on his back and buttocks, cleaning them but making them hurt all the more, crudely his arse was slapped and he felt the penatration of someones finger, Porthos he thought biting down on his lip and tucking his chin down not caring how his throat burned with pain, beneath him Aramis`s nipple clamps stung painfully as did the ball clamps, made all the worse as Porthos swiftly prepared his body, his cock reacting and throbbing with the sharp studds digging into his flesh.

The brutally hard thrust into his body had fresh tears springing to his eyes, Porthos grip on his hips so tight his hands were hurting, dimly he could hear Athos and Aramis encouraging him as he fucked the sub, "Pull `is legs wider!" he panted and d`Artagnan felt a throbbing burn as the ropes stretched him further out his joints aching in protest, Aramis apparently could`nt wait his turn and came round to stand before d`Artagnan cupping his chin and opening his breeches pushing his aching hard cock between bitten swollen lips and fucking d`Artagnan`s mouths as the sub gagged and dug his nails into his palms praying for this to end soon.

Saddly for d`Artagnan it was not over by a long shot.  
After both Aramis and Porthos had come it was Athos turn and as always he took his time, exagerating each move making d`Artagnan`s balls throb with pressure and his insides feel as if they would explode with the need for release.

His hands ran all over d`Artagnan`s raw bloody back adding to his pain, "Got anythin` t`say?" Porthos grunted lifting d`Artagnan`s head by his hair, with his tongue numb and jaw aching he could`nt form words if he`d wanted to mearly closing his eyes and wincing as the slap hit his cheek on the left then the right "Li`l sods got some stamina!" Porthos chuckled mistaking his silence for endurance not mental and physical distress  
"We`ll see about that!" Athos said pushing himself over d`Artagnan`s throbbing back to reach round and toy with the nipple clamps sending white hot shots of pain through the young sub, the brutal rutting battered his belly against the bench rubbing the skin raw and leaving splinters inside the abraded skin, "Think he can take two at once?" Aramis asked stroking himself back to hardness  
"Can`t you wait a moment?" Athos asked pausing in his rutting  
"Nope!" Aramis grinned nodding to Porthos who helped hoist Athos up so he was half laying over d`Artagnan adding to throbbing pressure on his bound limbs and all but cutting him in half as he was pressed over the bench, the strain of Aramis entering him with Athos already there made him feel as if he`d be split in half  
"Oh you like this don`t you?, you li`l slut?" Porthos teased pinching d`Artagnan`s cheeks and slapping them again "Making me hard jus` watchin` wanna do som`in `bout tha`?", without waiting for an answer he thrust into d`Artagnan abused mouth joining in on the brutal rutting as d`Artagnan trembled and sobbed inside promising himself he would never, never do anything that could bring this on again.

D`Artagnan did`nt remember being cut loose from the ropes, nore being taken into the bathroom, he could`nt remember when the abuse had stopped, his whole body still continued to throb with pain, semen flowing down his thighs and both his nipples red raw, his cock, balls and throat bruised and torn from the studs, belly a welted mass of sore flesh, his back a mess of lashing wounds.

Dimly he could recall Athos telling him to wash before leaving him alone, and the ewer was there full of cold water.  
Shaking like a leaf d`Artagnan reached for the water making to dip his hands in when a sudden deep cramping pain had him doubled over with a strangled cry, inside he felt as if a giant fist as just thrust into his intestines and was trying to drag them all out!.  
He felt his legs give out under him and he fell to the floor tears starting to roll down his cheeks as he touched himself finding blood running down his thighs to pool on the floor, soft sobs began to escape his mouth as he realised what was happening remembering before, in the cellar, the lost baby, this baby, going to join the other one  
"No, no no NO!" he heard himself cry doubling over and clutching his middle as a searing cramp ran through him a mass of blood pumping out of his body even as he fought against it.

"D`Artagnan!", Athos`s worried voice reached his ears, was it worried?, was it angry?, d`Artagnan did`nt know, all he knew was that his baby was dying, and he wished that he would soon follow.

"Oh my God!" Aramis cried as the three of them burst into the bathroom finding their sub in the throes of a miscarriage, a miscarriage they most likly had caused themselves with their "Punishment"  
"Jesus Christ!" Porthos whispered his dark features paling to an ugly grey in shame and fear  
"Go and get a Physician!" Athos bellowed and he tried to lift d`Artagnan onto his lap and comfort him, however the sub appeared inconsolubale continuing to howl with pain as blood pumped out of him in a sickening flow  
"For Christs sakes one of you!, get some help!?" Athos all but screamed finally snapping the other doms out of their stupors and sending Aramis running to get the nearest physician or mid wifehe could find  
"He never said, we did`nt know!" Porthos mumbled sinking down onto the floor to stroke d`Artagnan`s hair and watching in horror as the remains of their baby slid out in a flow of crimson, "D`Artagnan, just hold on, you`ll be alright, we`re getting help for you, you`ll be alright" Athos whispered repeating this chant over and over, while d`Artagnan slipped further from him, from the world loosing himself in the blessed darkness of unconsciousness from which he hoped he would not recover.

D`Artagnan looked as small and fragile as a china doll, as he was laid in bed, his skin was ashen pale, eyes darkly shadowed and lips giving an alarming blue tinge showing just how much blood he had lost.  
The Physician Dr Delacroix had ordered a large fire to be lit and kept burning in the hearth, there was no chance of saving the baby which had obviously been lost on the bathroom floor, so instead to ordered hot boiled water and clean linen to wash d`Artagnan clean with, to stave off infection which could easily cost his life.  
Once d`Artagnan was clean he fed him a dose of poppy syrup to keep him sleeping and docile, giving his body the best chance at rest and recovery.

Dr Delacroix had d`Artagnan wrapped in the thicket blankets available and had a heat stone placed beneath his feet, saying that he must be kept warm, he also wrote out a list of things for Athos, Aramis and Porthos to give d`Artagnan once he awoke.  
He needed to be eating plenty of dark green vegtables and red meats for the iron, and lots of fluids to help make up for the lost blood, especially milk and good strong red wine.

"Will he be alright?" Athos asked his voice low and face looked haggard with worry and guilt  
"Should be" Delacroix replied "He`s young and fit, I don`t see why he should`nt make a full recovery"  
"Thank God" Aramis breathed crossing himself and kissing his rosery which he had been praying over for the last hour  
"Though why in Gods name you three saw fit to punish him so brutally while he was with child confounds me!" Delacroix snapped having seen the bruises and other give away signs of a Dominants aggression on d`Artagnan`s body  
"We did`nt know" Porthos whispered though it sounded weak to his own ears  
"Is there anything more we can do for him?" Aramis asked  
"No, just keep him warm and get the provisions I suggested" Delacroix replied snapping shut his bag "However if he starts to run a fever give him pleanty of water and call me"  
"We shall" Athos said fishing his purse from his belt and handing the man all the coins he had which Porthos added to  
"I`ll take my leave then" Delacroix said giving them all a hard look before he turned and went down the stairs leaving Athos, Aramis and Porthos to look with sickening guilt at d`Artagnan`s form in the bed, and if they turned their heads the thick pool of congealed blood on the floor in the bathroom they had not been able to face cleaning up.

It was so hot he felt like he was in an oven!, like he was being cooked!, was he in hell?, had he died and finally gone to hell?, Robert had said he would go there, was a cheap whore that would burn in hell.

Slowly, as if lead weights were attached to his eyes d`Artagnan forced himself to open them blinking away the grit and sleep, his head feeling heavy with a thick fog covering his brain.  
The rest of his body felt oddly numb, limbs heavy and sluggish, inside he was sore, horribly sore with a dull ache in his lower belly.  
He slowly took in the sight of the bed room, the fire roaring in the hearth, Porthos having fallen alseep on a stool beside it, poker in hand to keep it hot, Aramis and Athos on either side of the bed his hands in theirs, Aramis was also clutching his rosary having fallen asleep praying, Athos was slumped in an uncomfortable looking position his face tired and pale however he was still awake or at least only dosing lightly and quickly came too when he noticed d`Artagnan was awake.

"Oh thank God!" he breathed sitting up and bringing d`Artagnan`s hand to his lips kissing the knuckles one by one "I thought we were going to loose you and I..........I could`nt bear it" the raw emotion on Athos usually stoic face made d`Artagnan`s heart ache and he tried to say something but his throat was too dry which Athos noticed and quickly grabbed the milk jug on the side board pouring a glass and holding it to d`Artagnan`s lips for him to drink, the movement disturbed Aramis and Porthos both of whom rushed to d`Artagnan`s side kissing his hands and face  
"We are so so sorry" Aramis all but sobbed "If we`d known you were with child....."  
"Why did`nt you tell us?" Porthos asked "We`d never have laid a finger on you!, hurt one hair on your head!"  
"I did`nt know" d`Artagnan whispered, it had been as much a shock to him when he`d started to bleed as it was to them, he could not have been more than a month along......with Roberts baby he`d been heading into his third month  
"We are still to blame for this none the less" Athos said looking retched "And we would more than understand if you did not wish to remain at our sides"  
D`Artagnan`s eyes widened at this and he looked at his dominants in turn feeling a sickening twist in his stomach  
"You don`t.......you want me to....go?" he stammered feeling like he`d just been punched in the stomach Oh God!, this was it!, they`d throw him out on the streets now!, a useless Sub, could`nt follow rules, could`nt carry a child!, why would they want to keep him?  
"No God no! d`Artagnan no!, thats not what we meant at all, we love you so much we want you so much,we would never never want you to leave!, Athos simply meant that if you wish to leave us, wish to break our bonding, we will not stand in your way"  
"I don`t" d`Artagnan whispered "I love you three, I don`t want,,,,,,,,I can`t be without you"  
"Nore we without you mon petit Gascon" Athos purred rolling himself on the bed to wrap about d`Aragnan`s side and place soft kissess into his hair and down his face "We love you d`Artagnan, utterly and completely"  
"We`ll take care of you, get you back to health" Aramis promised joining the snuggle pile and wrapping himself d`Artagnans other side and kissing the side of his face Porthos joined the last spooning over Aramis and stretched an arm round to stroke d`Artagnans hair  
"We love you d`Artagnan please don`t leave us" he begged feeling Aramis stiffen at the mention of d`Atagnan`s departing once again  
"I won`t, I love you too" D`Atagnan whispered faituge coming over him making him sleepy once again  
"Go to sleep mon amour" Aramis breathed kissing his cheek "We here, we`re right here".

Slowly d`Artagnan drifted back into dreams, dreams of violences, of miscarriages, of pain, and loneliness, he knew one thing now, he was never never going to break any rules again so they would never have a reason to punish him again, and he was going to have to get with child and soon, for he doubted they would wish to stay with him no matter what they said if he continued to proove to weak and useless to carry one to term 

D`Artagnan was on bed rest for ten days, even after the bleeding stoped after three days his Doms did not let him out of bed for more than bathroom visits, even insisting on washing him themselves in bed with damp clothes, bringing him steaming hot bowls of thick vegetable soups and rich beef and lamb stews, Athos even managing to find some finely braised venison which he brought especially for d`Artagnan, Porthos rustling up some sweet potatoes from the New World that he baked for the Gascon, Aramis scouring the market for any and all delicacies from Gascony to tempt the young sub who still look ghostly pale and fatigued despite sleeping for a good sixteen hours a day.

More troubling was the fact he hardly spoke, just staring into space biting his lip or nails so much that Porthos threatend to put mittens on him if he did`nt stop after he`d drawn blood more than once!.

Athos stated that he was likely grieving over the baby, and his pain was still to raw for him to speak of it, saying that they should wait and let him deal with it his own way, let him come to them when he was ready to speak.

At night they would bundle about d`Artagnan, cuddling up to him and kissing his face and hair, whispering words of love to him even as he lay limp, almost corpse like beneath them.

As the three Doms slept d`Artagnan would lay awake, feeling sweltered and suffocated in the heat of the room and the press of the men.  
What had felt comforting and safe now felt like a rope about his throat cutting off his air way, he could`nt relax with them holding him like this, feared moving an inch even when his bladder became desperate for release, because if he moved, if he disturbed them........., Robert had always been furrious if he`d been disturbed, d`Artagnan could remember being thrown into a bath tub of ice cold water and made to sit in it all night shivering and frozen his nose bloody and tears dripping down his cheeks....., He made firm resolve with himself during the nights of insomnia, swearing to never never incur the anger of the three Doms again, to never do anything either here or as a Musketeer that might anger them.  
He would be the perfect Sub, quiet, meek, subservient, bow to their every wish and desire, never give voice to any complaint, or even think about disagreeing with them, he would even give up his commission if they wished for him to, be their wife at home for them, wear a collar and greet them at the door on his knees if they wanted him to, the house would be spotless and food always ready for them, and any time night or day he would be willing to submit to their desires, let them take him and fuck him as they wished.

He would never mess up again, would never be hurt again, and would please them into loving him once again.

As soon as Dr Delacroix pronounced him fit enough to leave the bed d`Artagnan began him new regime.

He rose at dawn to begin cleaning the bathroom and get water heated ready for when the Dominants would rise, next he set about cleaning the kitchen and cooking the breakfasts picking at a slice of bread before getting on with the laundry.  
By the time Aramis awoke hard and horny d`Artagnan would already be outside hanging the washing out to dry, breakfast laying on the table waiting for when he Athos and Porthos were ready.  
Not use to dealing with his own morning glory, either Athos or Porthos got the "Pleasure" of being awoken by Aramis humping them and spilling over them before scratching his head and stumbling off to the bathroom leaving them swearing and sticky!.

While the dominants ate their breakfast, d`Artagnan would tidy the bedroom and pick up the wet towels left on the floor ad polish the boots ready to go to the garrison.  
Several times one of them asked him to join them at the table, but while he did so, submitting to their request at once he sat silent at the table not bothering to eat anything, certainly not snuggled on one of their laps being petted and fed slices of bacon or sausage as he had before.

Perhaps had there not been four of them in the household his sudden silence would have been noticed more swiftly, but Porthos and Aramis ever talkative and noisy kept d`Artagnan`s silence from being obvious, if he was asked a question he would answer in short brief words before falling silent again and making certain he never made eye contact with any of them, keeping his head bowed as was befitting a sub.

Sex was reinstated within a week of his rising from the bed.  
Aramis the eternal lover being the first to broach the subject and d`Artagnan instantly agreeing, laying back and submitting himself without a word of complaint.  
To his relief they took him face to face as they had in the past, showing him tenderness with loving kissess and touches, while d`Artagnan lay perfectly pliant beneath them letting them take him as they wished, his body reacting naturally as his cock was stimulated by the pressure of his prostate and the rubbing between their bodies, however he did not reach out and try to hold his doms, nore cry out and mewl for them begging for more, instead he kept himself silent and closed his eyes unless asked to keep them open, silently spilling his seed and clenching his fists to keep from crying out as they came inside him.

D`Artagnan`s behavior was the same at the garrison as it was at home.  
He kept silent, no longer speaking out in protest of offering opinion of his own while on parade before Treville, he did not joke or play around with the other men, simply doing his duty whatever it may be without a word.  
Sitting rigid at the table with his doms picking at food and drink his shoulders hunched flinched whenever anyone came close to him.

Sparring he still enjoyed, and it was perhaps the one time he as normal, the adrenaline and excitement fueling him as he worked on his swordsmanship with either his dominants or one of the other man, a feral smile would grace his pale fatigued face as he crossed blades with Athos taking care to listen to every tip the older man had and use it to improve himself.  
He was getting closer to hitting the balls eye when firing pistols with Aramis, tensing when the tactile Dom placed a hand on his shoulder or arm, or stood behind him adjusting his stance to what it should be.  
Hand to hand was what he dreaded, finding it almost impossible to keep from wanting to run whenever someone came at him with their fists, be it his Dominants or someone else, though very few of the Musketeers dared lay a hand on him even in sparring for fear of what would be done to them should they get a lucky shot and hurt d`Artagnan.

His dominants were not fools, they knew something was bothering him, could not have failed to notice d`Artagnan`s change in attitude.  
It was not just that he did not correct them or argue, it was that he tried to be invisible, shrinking in on himself, and considering the weight he`d lost with the fact he hardly ate and was pushing himself into doing more work than ever he was fading away before their eyes.  
He no longer laughed at jokes, or tried to make any of his own, did not contribute to conversation even when invited to, answering with either yes or no and otherwise acting as if he were a servent and not permitted to speak.

"D`You think it`s because of the miscarriage?" Aramis asked and he Athos and Porthos sat at the table sharing a bottle of brandy Porthos had "Won" in a card game, the sucker he`d conned having lost all his money and two bottles to the man! something that would normally have made d`Artagnan laugh at the poor sods expense, this time he remained silent mearly getting glasses for the Doms to drink from while he went off to do some chore or other.  
"He`s like a bloody Ghost!" Porthos grunted sourly "He gets any thinner he`ll be one!, more like sleeping with a skeleton than a human!"  
"Its no wonder his apatite is effected by his emotions, he did loose a baby" Aramis said with a sigh "Lost it because of us"  
"You think I don`t pissin` known that!?" Porthos bellowed beligerently "I feel fuckin` sick every time I go into the soddin` bathroom!"  
"Gentlemen enough!" Athos snapped cutting off an argument before it could begin "Fighting amongst ourselves is not going to help matters, especially not.........D`Artagnan?" he noticed the young Sub standing in the door way having been drawn by the sound of raised voices  
"Here, come and sit down lad" Porthos said pushing back his stool in the hope he`d sit on his lap only to be disappointed by d`Artagnan perching on another stool loking ready to bolt at the first moment, his hands in his lap and eyes down cast.

Nodding to Aramis and Porthos, Athos decided to start the conversation, pushing a glass of brandy over to d`Artagnan to did`nt bother to take it  
"Is everything alright?" he asked  
"Fine" came the immediate reply, d`Artagnan not looking up at all  
"Really?" Aramis asked sarcastically "Is that why your white as a sheet and look like a strong gust of wind could knock you over?", d`Artagnan flinched by gave no response instead sucking his bottom lip into his mouth to bite on  
"Whats wrong lad?, is it about the baby?" Porthos asked as gently as he could making d`Artagnan finally look up and breifly meet his eyes  
"We are sorry beyond words about that" Athos said "If we could undo it............please don`t blame yourself, blame us!, but not yourself"  
"Don`t know if I would`nt have lost it anyway" d`Artagnan whispered his voice hardly loud enough to be heard "It was no ones fault"  
"Then why............why are you being like this?" Aramis ground out in frustration "I`ve had better conversations from dead bodies!"  
"That I`d believe!" Porthos snorted getting a sour look in return  
"Ignoring what that half wit says!" Aramis said "We want to see you happy again, I want to see you happy!"  
"I am" d`Artagnan hastened to tell him "Nothings wrong I promise"  
"If thats true, come over `ere and sit on m`lap!" Porthos said slapping his knees, swiftly d`Artagnan moved to do as requested sitting down on Porthos lay stiff as a board as he pulled him into his embrace hardly able to keep from flinching as Porthos kissed his throat "What d`you say we go out tonight?, my treat?, Go t`The Crown they do a good plate o`grub and an pint!"  
"Your treat don`t you mean your latest victims treat!?" Athos asked with a smirk  
"You say potatoe...."  
"C`mon then lets go!" Aramis said draining his glass and slapping the table "I feel the need for a few bar maids to flirt with!"  
"What else is new?" Athos sighed getting to his feet, his gaze still on d`Artagnan who was back to being silent, slipping on his cloak without comment and letting himself be pulled along by the others head down and posture drawn in distant making him curse under his breath and even more derermind to find out what was really troubling the young sub, it was`nt just about the baby that he was sure of, there was something else there, eating at him like a cancer, and if something was`nt done soon then like a cancer it would destroy him.

Tired, he was so tired, his body seeming to be running on pure steam, his head was constantly fuzzy and his reactions slow with fatigue, eyes half lidded as they felt so sleepy, his joints aching like an old man with gout.  
Headaches, sore throats, and dizzy spells were becoming more frequent as weeks passed, but d`Artagnan refused to acknowledge the symptoms of sheer exhaustion.

Even if he had not been rising at the crack of dawn, he could not settle to sleep for more a hand full of hours in any case, nightmares were keeping him awake more and more, the fear of suffering another making him wish to avoid sleep as much as possible, his subconscious mind twisting memory and fantasy sometimes changing the memory of Roberts abuse of him with his three dominants or worse having all four of them together beating and raping him.

Night after night he would shoot awake in a cold sweat, his body shaking and tears running down his cheeks.  
It would take several minutes for him to calm down and convince himself it was merely a dream and not reality, though in his heart he was terrified it could become a reality.  
He was not just fearing further punishment from his Dominants, but of Robert joining them from Gascony, technically he was still wed to the cruel and brutal man, and he could challenge Athos, Aramis, and Porthos for possession of d`Artagnan.

The thought of returning to Robert was terrifying enough, but worse was the thought that Athos, Aramis, and Porthos would welcome Robert into their midst, join forces with him to make d`Artagnan`s life a complete nightmare.

Death would be preferable to that, far more preferable, even if it meant he would be damned for all eternity for his suicide he would rather that than live in terror all his life, beaten, raped, desperate, forced to bear unwanted unloved children, treated worse than a slave.  
No he would rather die.

More worryingly for himself he had found himself staring at knives in his hands, held poised over his wrist sometimes the blade even digging into the skin drawing a bead of blood.  
For s split second, despite the fear of the fact he was catching himself like this with no recollection of how he had ended up in this position, he could imagine himself plunging the blade into his flesh seeing it sink deep and part the skin in two, see the blood spurting and pouring out running hot and thick over his hand to puddle onto the floor, for a moment he was tempted, so very tempted to do it, to just end it all, not caring about the pain he would feel, drawn by the peace that even purgatory would offer him.

But he held back from doing so, putting the knife down and continuing to live, as such, if what he was doing could really be called living, in truth it was just existing, drifting through, going through the motions and avoiding contact that would make him have to come out of his own silent solitude.

The house was spotless, in fact it was so clean it all but shone and sparkled from the constant cleaning, polishing, and dusting that was going on.

The washing was always done, Athos, Aramis, and Porthos had fresh clean clothes every single day, and they had the best foods cooked and served for them.  
In fact they were being treated like Kings, not mere Musketeers, would have had no cause for complaint, were it not for the fact that d`Artagnan was looking weaker and sicker than ever.

His clothes were all but hanging off his emaciated frame, his eyes were hollow and face gaunt, he was frequently getting sick with chills, having to use cups of honey and lemon juice to sooth his sore throat and try to clear his muzzy head.  
If he spoke, which was become more and more rare his voice was small and rasping, as if he were struggling to get enough air out to make his vocal cords work.  
He was avoiding contact to the point he was all but hiding from Athos, Aramis and Porthos, sometimes not even joining them in bed, sleeping in the kitchen if he slept at all.

His work as a Musketeer was begining to suffer aswell, his lack of energy, constant fatigue, slow reflexes, and dizzy spells were interfering with his work.  
He was struggling to find enough strength to go on patrols, loosing in sparring matches to Musketeers who had never beaten him before, it was only luck and chance that there had been no serious missions for them to undertake as if there had of been then d`Artagnan would not have been able to function.

His dominants were not the only ones to notice something was wrong, hell anyone with eyes could see how sick he looked, his change in attitude, the fact he was a mere shadow of the exuberant dynamic young man he had been weeks before.  
So it was not a real surprise when Treville called Athos, Porthos and Aramis into his office one late afternoon after he had observed d`Artagnan stumble and surrender in yet another training match, and all but drag himself off to the tables to get a drink looking ready to collapse at any moment.

"Captain?" Aramis greeted as they stood in the office before Treville  
"What is going on?" Treville asked without preamble there was not much point in beating about the bush, and he was not the sort of man who did so anyway  
"Whats goin` on wit` what?" Porthos asked  
"d`Artagnan" Treville replied, the three dominants changed looks between them shifting uncomfortably "C`mon!" Treville barked his patience short, (He`d been dealing with Richelieu today!), "He looks like a walking corpse!, is skinnier than half the retches in the court of miracles!, dos`nt eat, dos`nt speak, what hell is going on with him?, is he sick?", again they exchanged glances before Athos cautiously spoke  
"In truth Captain we are not sure what is wrong with d`Artagnan"  
"He`s your bloody Sub is`nt he?" Treville snapped  
"He`s....he was" Aramis broke off unsure how to continue so Athos took over  
"He suffered a Miscarriage two months ago, following a....punishment for braking a rule"  
"A miscarriage?" Treville repeated "I did`nt know he was with child"  
"Nore did we" Athos said "Nore did he in fact, it was a very horrible shock to us all, him most of all"  
"Well it`s not surprising that he`s so depressed then" Treville sighed sitting down "I offer my condolences of course and my understanding, however I can not have a Musketeer in such a state, at present he is totaly unfit for duty, he can barely even lift his sword at the moment let alone use it"  
"Are you dismissing him?" Athos asked seeing the anger rising in both Porthos and Aramis  
"No, I`ll put him on sick leave, for the next two weeks, in that time I hope he can sort himself out"  
"We`ll do our best to see that he is fit for duty in that time" Athos stated  
"Do so" Treville said "But........go easy on the lad, loosing a baby........my wife was heart broken when she lost our third child, took months for her to recover, he needs love and support not punishment"  
"We would`nt punish him for being upset" Aramis cried just as one of the other Musketeers burst through the door  
"Sorry Captain but it`s d`Artagnan" he panted "He`s collapsed"

D`Artagnan was slowly being helped to his feet by a couple of Musketeers by the time Athos, Aramis and Porthos got down to the garrison training yard  
"D`Artagnan!!!" Porthos bellowed shoving Musketeers out of the way to reach the subs side and gripped him by his shoulders "Are you alright?, what the hell happened?, why did`nt you say you were sick!?" he blurted all in one breath  
"M`okay" d`Artagnan whispered looking some what unsteady on his feet "I just......I..."  
"He said he felt sick, got up and then dropped down in a dead faint!" Serge the former Musketeer and now garrison cook said "Lad went white a sheet!"  
"Are you ill?" Aramis asked reaching to feel d`Artagnan`s forehead relived in finding no fever however the painful bruise like shadows under d`Artagnan`s eyes did trouble him more than ever  
"Take him home, get a physician to him" Treville ordered firmly "D`Artagnan from this moment you are now on sick leave for the next two weeks"  
"Sir?" d`Artagnan whispered  
"You three get him home, you can have compassionate leave for today and tomorrow"  
"Yes sir" Aramis said exchanging a glance with Athos who silently left to get the physician leaving him and Porthos to get d`Artagnan home.

 

Delacroix was now more pleasant to the the three dominants than he had been before, had scowled when Athos had burst into his office and demanded he come to their home immediately, not caring that he was dealing with a patient at the time and had all but threatened to shoot the man if he did not leave and let Delacroix come with him!.

His mood did not improve when he was greeted with the sight of an emaciated d`Artagnan laying on the bed looking sick and weak,  
"What appears to be the trouble?" he asked without preamble  
"I`m fine" d`Artagnan lied flinching back from the Doctors touch as the man reached for his wrist  
"He fainted at the garrison" Athos said "The rest you can see for yourself"  
"Indeed" Delacroix replied taking d`Artagnan`s wrist and taking out a portable time keeping device to count the young mans pulse, "Your heart rate is faster than it should be for a young man" he said "Have you been sick recently?, fever?, stomach upsets?"  
"No" d`Artagnan whispered  
"He said he felt sick before he fainted" Porthos put in, and felt nauseous on the way here"  
"I see, stomach pains?, head aches?, vomiting?"  
"No" d`Artagnan said refusing to meet anyones gaze making the Doctor sigh and turn to the dominants who were hovering over them making him uncomfortable let alone d`Artagnan  
"If you please!, I need privacy if I am to examine him!" he snapped  
"Examine?" Porthos barked "What d`you think....."  
"We`ll leave you in peace Doctor" Athos said cutting Porthos off letting the Doctor do what he must as ushering Aramis and Porthos out of the room where they waited in the hall leaving the Doctor to examine their submissive all of them too concerned with what might be wrong to speak or speculate just waiting with bated breath for the Doctor to come out and tell them what was going on.

Delacroix came out of the bedroom looking far less grave than any of the dominants had feared he would, in fact he greeted them with a small and rare smile, rare for them in any case  
"Gentlemen I believe congratulations is in order" he said formally  
"Congratulations?" Athos repeated raising an eyebrow, next to him Aramis gasped slapping a hand over his mouth his eyes looking ready to pop out of his head in excitement!  
"Indeed, I have good news for you" Delacroix stated as Aramis just about hoped on the spot Porthos looking at him like he was insane!  
"D`Artagnan is pregnant"  
"Pregnant!?" Athos breathed as Pothos let out a bark of joyous laughter and clapped his hands  
"I knew it!, I knew it!!!" Aramis yelled "A baby! we`re gonna have a baby!"  
"Actually you`ll be having two babies!" Delacroix corrected "There are two fetal heartbeats, it is twins"  
"Twins!" now it was Athos`s turn to have bulging eyes!  
"TWINS!" it was doubtfull Aramis`s voice could have gotten louder!  
"Is d`Artagnan alright?, his health?, he has not been well recently" Athos said recovering himself  
"He is very under weight which I an concerned about, he needs to start resting more and eating more, normally I would not worry about this but he is weak and sickly at present and a twin pregnancy is not easy on anyone especially not males" Delacroix said "He`s clearly at the point of exhaustion, and that alone could risk a another miscarriage, he needs to rest and relax, you three need to take care of him"  
"Of course we will!, how could you think otherwise?" Porthos snapped  
"After the state I first saw him in after your "Punishment" and the fact he`s so malnourished and exhausted now?" Delacroix replied "You can hardly think I would take your word on face value", he looked the three men up down with undisguised disgust turning on his heel and leaving letting the Dominants go into the bedroom to see d`Artagnan.

Pregnant, again, so soon.

It was the last thing d`Artagnan had expected to hear from the Doctor, and while a few months ago he would have greeted such news with immense joy, now he had mixed feelings, he was not certain he could be happy about this.  
A baby right now, no not one baby but two!.  
Could he really bring children into such a world he was living in, where he was frightend of his own shadown, was awaiting the next punishment and growing more and more fearful each day?.

As Athos, Porthos, and Aramis came in with beaming smiles and joyful cries, d`Artagnan forced a watery smile to his face not resisting as they piled onto the bed pulling him into their arms and kissing him congratulating him and telling him how happy their were, Aramis was lifting up his shirt to bear his middle and kiss the soft skin nuzzeling his face against his belly and talking to the babies within  
"I don`t think they can hear you" Athos said sounding amused  
"How would you know?" Aramis replied "I`ll bet my boys can hear me!"  
"Your boys?" Porthos laughed "They could be girls! and who says they`re yours?"  
"I say it!" Aramis sniffed  
"It could be a boy and a girl" Athos offered placing his hand over d`Artagnans belly shooing Aramis away! "Boys or girls, they will be very welcome and very loved", d`Artagnan gave him a weak smile, inside his heart in termoil as he tried to figure out what he was going to do.

The need for d`Artagnan to eat more to regain his strength and lost weight was hampered by the morning sickness which seemed to strike right after the discovery of the pregnancy.

From the moment d`Artagnan awoke he was finding himself doubled over vomiting into the privy, the nausea, fatigue, muzzy headed feeling stayed with him through out the day making him want to just curl up in bed and sleep.  
He would collapse in bed at night falling straight to sleep, however his sleep was not restful, it was constantly unsettled with increasing nightmares.

Part of the nightmares was a parents natural fear of there being something wrong with the baby or in this case babies, horrible dreams in which the babies were still born, or born conjoined, a single body with two faces one at the back one at the front, malformed limbs dangling loose off their bodies.  
Or dreams of horrific birthing, of himself in the throes of labour, blood pouring out of his body coating the bed linen in crimson, Athos, Aramis, and Porthos standing about the bed grim faced, with Doctor heating a surgical blade over a candle preparing to cut his belly open to get the babies out, an act that would kill him but save the babies.  
Or of his having given birth to perfect healthy twins, he was laying on bloody bed sheets, exhausted, soaked in sweat, reaching out for the babies which were being held by Athos and Aramis, however the Dominants took the babies away from him, and Porthos proceeded to pick him up and drag him out of the house dumping him in the streets bleeding and screaming for his babies.

Time and again he would awaken shaking and sobbing with fear, sometimes so upset he was forced to leap from the bed to go and throw up what little he had in his stomach.

This fear, lack of apatite and fatigue was making him look worse than ever, his body seeming to shrink in on itself, his back hunching over like an old man, arms hugging himself as if he were cold, head down and eyes hollow in shadowed sockets.

Athos, Aramis, and Porthos were growing increasingly worried for his health, both mental and physical health.  
The two weeks in which he was meant to recover his strength had come and gone with him only growing weaker, Treville had taken one look at him and put on indefinate leave until such time as he recovered from his malady.

The loss of his duties as Musketeer should have bothered him more than it did, but right now d`Artagnan seemed not to care in the least, as if he were slipping away from the world more and more as time went by.

The concern and love that his dominants were showing him, was scaring d`Artagnan more than it was comforting him, his nightmares making him wonder if in fact it was only concern for the babies, and that they would get rid of him as soon as he gave birth.

Plus he could tell that their patience was wearing thin, they were starting to snap with him more than they had in weeks, loose patience with his lack of interaction, with him flinching everytime they tried to touch him or came near him, the fact he froze when they touched his middle, and especially his repeated refusal to tell them what was wrong.

The only thing d`Artagnan could feel sure of right now, was that he wanted the babies, that was the one thing he knew to be true.  
But his fear of being seperated from them was making him come to a horrible conclusion, one he had never thought he`d face again.

He had to leave, and not just leave Paris but get out of France altogether.  
Where he would go, what he would do, he was not certain, nor how he would support two babies once he was gone.  
He would have to lie about his name and his past, find some form of employment and try to hide the pregnancy as long as he could or he would be dismissed from the post before he had any chance of making enough money to support his little family.

However once the thought took shape in his mind he found himself resolved on it, quietly packing a bag with food, water, and clothing, keeping it hidden so his dominants would not find it, making ready for when he would run.

 

Athos was tired, he was exhausted in fact, trying to help d`Artagnan, trying to figure out what was wrong with him, trying not to loose his temper was all taking it`s tole on him.  
He was walking aimlessly through the market when he ran into Constance for the first time in a few weeks,  
"I hear congratulations is in order" she said with a broad smile "Twins I hear?"  
"Yes" Athos said returning the smile  
"I take it the dinner went well then?"  
"Dinner?" Athos asked frowning  
"The dinner d`Artagnan was making for you" Constance prompted "About two months ago?, he`d bought half the market to make a special dinner for you, Aramis and Pothos?"  
Special dinner?, two months ago?, Athos felt like his stomach had just been punched, as relisation came over him, the reason d`Artagnan had gone out without telling them, he`d been trying to do something special for them, had been attacked and........"Mon dieu!" he gasped his face paling  
"Athos?, are you okay?" Constance asked  
"No, no I`m not!" Athos whispered "I have to go, I`ll see you soon" he said hurrying away leaving Constance looking after him with a puzzled expression on her face.

Athos grabbed Aramis and Porthos from an Inn where Porthos was proceeding the fleece a couple of red guards out of their monthly pay!, he hastily explained what he had learned, Aramis going sheet white and Porthos cursing as they hurried home to make amends or try to make amends  
"Why did`nt he say anything?" Porthos demanded "Tell us why he went out?"  
"When did we give him a chance?" Aramis asked bitterly "We would`nt let him speak remember?"  
"Fuckin christ!"  
"We`ve alot to make up for" Athos said as he opened the front door "One hell of alot".

The house was silent, the Dominants suspecting that d`Artagnan was in bed and headed upstairs only to find the bed empty and a single letter left on the pillow which Athos snatched up his face going grey as he read it 

Athos, Porthos, Aramis

I know you`ll hate me for this, and I`m sorry, but I can not continue this way.  
We are just making each other misrable, you three deserve a better submissive, someone worthy of you, that person will never be me.  
I promise I`ll look after the babies, and love them enough for all of us,  
Yours always Charles d`Atagnan

"Jesus!" Aramis whispered as he read the letter "Where would he go?"  
"Gascony?" Porthos suggested  
"No, to obvious, he knows we`ll tear the country apart, he`d want to get out of France" Aramis replied running a hand through his hair "Why would he think he`s not worthy of us?"  
"I don`t know, but I think there is more to it than mearly our punishment of him" Athos said he went over to the money chest opening it up and nodding his head noting d`Artagnan had taken some of the coffers "He has funds, he could buy himself passage on a ship"  
"La Harve is the closest port" Porthos said "Ships going out to Spain, Germany, America"  
"Then thats where we`ll go" Athos said marching out the door with the others following him  
"We`re not going to punish him for this right?" Aramis asked  
"Of course not" Athos replied as he swung himself up onto his horse "he needs out help, our love, we deserve to be punished not him"  
"I`ll cut off my own arms before I lay a hand on him again" Porthos grunted "And if I find those theives they`ll wish they`d never been conceived let alone born!, I`ll skin `em alive!, rip their guts out through their noses!, stuff their brains down their throats!"  
"Lets just focus on finding d`Artagnan, those tossers can wait" Athos stated kicking his horse into a brisk canter.

La Harve 

 

D`Artagnan had managed to purchase passage on a ship going to America, the ship did not leave for another two days, so he had found himself a room at an Inn while he waited, walking about La Harve aimlessly, keeping himself to himself wondering how he would survive in America what he would do and how he would support his family.  
With any luck he could find work on one of the farms in the colonys get bed and bored in return for labour, he would hide his pregnancy until it became impossible, then hopefully he would have enough money saved to be able to support himself through the final few weeks until the birth, after that...........he could`nt really look that far ahead yet, just hope that whatever family he worked for would take pity on a lone sub with twins to care for and let him continue to work for them.

Most of the time he found himself sitting on the wayside by the docks looking out to sea trying to picture what America would look like, he`d heard stories of course, but the vast country was still very much a mystery to him.  
Doing so made him long for Athos, Aramis, and Porthos, whom he knew would have relished this adventure, he missed them all so much it was hurting his heart, making him feel sicker than ever, something he suspected would grow worse as he left France and the distance grew between them.

he was completely lost in thought when a loud shout of his name brought his head up sharply and to his horror he saw his three dominants running towards him.

D`Artagnan froze for a moment, his heart seeming to cease beating in his chest and all the wind punched out of his body as he saw his three dominants riding towards him, the sun was in their faces making them squint, but the distortion looked to d`Artagnan like they were masks of pure rage directed at him.  
His fear kicking in and making his legs move he leaped up and began to run, pushing his way through the throngs of people who bustled about the busy harbor, shouts and insults rang in his ears as he ran, but it was the sound of horses hooves and his name being shouted that his his attention, making him constantly look over his shoulder seeing Athos and Porthos dismount, leaving their horses to force their own way through the crowds while Aramis spurred his horse on cutting a way through the people no doubt meaning to cut d`Artagnan off by getting ahead of him!.

Tears of fear springing to his eyes, his limbs shaking so much that his running was more of a sloppy stumble, d`Artagnan pushed and squeezed his way through sailors and merchants and dock side whores, looking over his shoulder again horrified to see Porthos closing on him, the large man using his broad shoulders as a battering ram to get people out of his way!,  
"D`Artagnan!" he shouted ruthlessly shoving a couple of merchants out of the way and sending their good tumbling to the floor!, d`Artagnan`s distraction worked against him as he slammed heavily into a fisherman carrying a crate of shell fish causing him to fall to the ground with a winded moan,  
"Fool!" the fisherman shouted "You nearly made me drop the lot!"  
"Sorry!" d`Artagnan whispered moving on all fours to try and get to his feet and letting out a scream of fright when he was suddenly seized by his collar and pulled up right!, reacting purely on instinct he thrust both elbows back and heard Porthos who had reached him give a pained groan as all the air was forced out of his stomach "D`Art!" he coughed loosing grip on the collar and giving d`Artagnan a chance to run once again just as Athos reached them  
"I`m fine go!" Porthos snarled rubbing his rapidly bruising middle  
"D`Artagnan!" Athos shouted picking up the chase, d`Artagnan risked a glance over his shoulder once again forcing his legs to run harder only to run straight into Aramis`s waiting arms!.

"d`Artagnan!" Aramis cried trying to hold the frightend younger man who immediately began to struggle against him "Calm down it`s alright!" Aramis shouted struggling to keep a grip of d`Artagnan who was frantically pulling and squirming, very aware of Athos being just a hairs breath away from him, with a final shove against Aramis he broke free but the shove knocked himself off balance and sent him tumbling off the pier down into the sea below!.

"No!" Aramis shouted in horror as he saw d`Artagnan fall, as far as any of them knew he could`nt swim......  
"D`Artagnan!" Athos bellowed shoving his way through the gathering on lookers and plunging himself in after the Submissive who was struggling to keep his head above the water, his leather weighing him down, and his untrained panic stricken limbs flailing in the water, his breathing hampered with coughing as water splashed into his face and mouth  
"D`Artagnan!" Athos cried swimming over and getting an arm about his waist holding him above the water  
"No, can`t swim!" d`Artagnan chocked out his fear of Athos put aside for the fear for drowning  
"Hold onto me, hold onto me!" Athos ordered keeping firm hold of the Sub and kicking for the pier where people were gathering with ropes and blankets and brandy, Aramis and Porthos in the front looking pale and frightend.

D`Artagnan was pulled up onto the pier, followed by Athos, both of them swiftly wrapped in thick woolen blankets and handed cups of brandy for the shock,  
"Is he alright?" Athos asked his teeth chattering as he gulped back the brandy, Porthos making him keep the blankets on even as he struggled against them  
"Aramis has got `im, worry `bout yer`ll for a minute" Porthos said glancing back to where d`Artagnan was bundled under blankets with Aramis arms around him for extra wamrth, he had brandy in his hands but was`nt drinking, his face grey and hands shaking  
"bes` get a room I think" Porthos said "Ai`n no one goin` no where tonight!".

Together Athos and Porthos walked over to d`Artagnan who looked up at them his eyes reminding Athos of a deer when a hunter aproaches with a knife in his hand, "We`re not going to hurt you" he said to the fearful younger man "We want to talk, make sure your alright, and apologise"  
"Apologise?" d`Artagnan asked looking between the three men  
"For alot of things" Porthos said "But firstly lets get you and Athos cleaned up before you both catch pneumonia!"  
"I....I have a room" d`Artagnan mumbled "We can go there"  
"Alright then, lead the way" Aramis said wrapping an arm about d`Artagnan`s shoulders, the younger man flinched but did`nt fight him, quietly leading them to the Inn that he was staying in.

Hot clean water was ordered, sheets and thick blankets, along with a good fire to be built in the room d`Artagnan was staying in, Porthos throwing a number of coins down to get the land lords approval.  
Once upstairs Athos swiftly stripped off and wrapped up in a bed sheet while they waited for the water to arrive.  
D`Artagnan silently did the same and after a brief pause deigned to join Athos in the blankets so they could keep each other warm.

The Submissive in his melted at the contact with his dominant wanting him to sink into the offered embrace and beg forgivness, while his fear kept him rigid and nervous even as Athos rubbed his hands and and arms for warmth.

"I ran into Constance today" Athos said gently "She told me why you went out that day two months ago, what you were doing"  
"So?" d`Artagnan whispered flexing his numb toes  
"So?, why did`nt you tell us?" Aramis asked "You wer`nt braking a rule through malice or lack of thought but to do something kind and loving"  
"I still broke a rule, I deserved to be punished" d`Artagnan replied  
"No, d`Art thats not rule braking, thats misunderstanding, mistaken actions, why did`nt you use the safety word we gave you?, you must have known you were being punished for a mistake?" Athos said making the younger man frown and shake his head  
"Rules rule is`nt it?, Subs follow what Doms want, do what they want, serve them, thats it"  
"No it bloody ai`nt!" Porthos growled "Thats jus` slavery not submission!, Submission is about following rules, submitting to us, but not about loosing your freedom, your rights as a person"  
D`Artagnan continued to look confused and shook his head, the convesation breifly cut off as the water was delivered along with some more brandy.

D`Artagnan bit his bottom lip avoiding everyones gaze as he fiddled with his hands in the sheet the Doms exchanging worried glances  
"D`Artagnan why would you think that you`re not worthy of us?" Athos asked as gently as he could "What could possibly give you such an idea as that?"  
"Cause m`not" d`Artagnan mumbled "Never was gonna be good enough but....." he was broken off by Porthos suddenly lunging forward onto his knees and grabbing his hands making him look into his eyes  
"You are more than good enough!, it is were who don`t deserve you!" he stated with as much conviction as when he spoke of the evils of slavery "I don`t know who or what gave you the idea that your not good enough but I`ll tell you right here and now, You Charles d`Artagnan of Lupiac in Gascony are the most beautiful, caring, loving, and wonderful submissive in the entire world", he bent forward kissing his knuckles one by one "I swear here and now I will never, never raise a hand to you in punishment again, in fact I`ll have them cut off before he even contemplate it!"

"I too" Aramis said sinking to his knees by Porthos "We harmed you, and we must beg your forgivness, and seek atonment for our sins against you, if any in this room is unworthy, then it is us!, for we have failed as your dominants in protecting and caring for you"

"You may punish us all in any way you deem fit for out crimes against you" Athos said making d`Atagnan jump as he remembered Athos wrapped beside him "We came here not to hurt you, not to dag you back to Paris as you feared, but to beg your forgiveness, if there is any chance you could grant it".

"Grant you........You`ve done nothing wrong!" d`Artagnan said his voice wobbling, too many throughs, too many emoions were running through him fo him to be able to understand  
"I deserved the punishment, I did!, I can`t punish you nore forgive you for you did nothing to warrent it!"  
"We beat and dominated you mercilessly and caused you to....loose the baby" Aramis said seeing the pain that flashed over d`Artagnan`s face  
"You go me a Docter, he never did" d`Artagnan whispered clurling hmself up in the blankets  
"He?, who never you a Doctor?" Athos asked waving a hand to silence the others  
"Robert" D`Artagnan whispered, "He.............was......is my husband, he..........all the time!, for no reason!, I did`nt brake a rule and he`d punish me anyway!, locked me in the cellar, for hours at a time, I lost the baby down there, it died on the cold stone, just a thick mass of blood that would`nt stop coming even as I cried and begged!"

"Oh My God!" Aramis whispered looking a sick, he rode for a moment before he stumbled over to the pot and preceeded to vomit into it  
"How long did this go on?" Athos gasped in sheer horror  
"Till I left, left gascony n`joined you guys" d`Artagnan said tears running down his cheeks now "He,,,,I could`nt take it anymore!, and I`m sorry for....".

He never got the rest of that sentence out as Athos, Aramis and Porthos suddenly have him enveloped in a massive embrace, Aramis sobbing opening, and Porthos hardly holding back his own tears at d`Artagnan`s tragic history, there was more to say, much more to come, but for now with everyone emotions so fragile right now the best they could do was to bring d`Artagnan into a warm and loving cocoon where they could hold him and keep him warm and safe, let him cry out his pain and sorrow while they held him.

When they were all feeling more clear headed then they would talk about everything, explain to d`Artaganan what is rights were as their Sub and that he had the right to refuse if he was not comfortable, could even refuse a form of punishment and request another if it went beyond his limits, and must know to use the safty word

When d`Artagnan awoke he found himself bundled tighter than a new born babe in blankets, cloaks and sheets.  
Three pillows were resting under his head and his dominants were laying or sitting on the bed beside him, adding their warmth to his body.

Clearly he had fallen asleep sometime during the cuddling and tears.  
He could remember telling them about Robert, about the miscarriage, could remember Aramis vomiting into the pot, Athos and Porthos torn between rage at Robert and wanting to comfort him, choosing the later as Robert was not present for them to rip apart slowly and painfully.

As comforting as this snuggling was, d`Artagnan was feeling rather too warm to be comfortable and quietly shifted, pushing down his mass of blankets and disturbing the dosing dominants who were on him in a moment feeling his head for a fever, checking he was well, pressing a drink into his hands and helping him sip, stroking his hair and helping him sit up!.

"Why did you never tell us about your husband?" Athos asked stroking d`Artagnans fingers with his thumbs  
"I.....I ran from him, a Sub`s betrayal is punishable is`nt it?"  
"Only when there is not just cause, and you had more than just cause" Aramis replied "You do know that don`t you?", the blank look on d`Artagnan`s face had him cursing and looking to Athos as Porthos growled something like "I fuckin` kill the shit bag!"  
"D`Artagnan how old were you when you were wed?" Athos asked carefully  
"Sixteen, just" d`Artagnan replied "Papa had two Dominant sons and had no use for a Sub beyond marriage"  
"And I`m guessing no one ever explained to you what Submission was, what rights you have, what is allowed and what is not" Porthos said, it was not really a question, d`Artagnan`s actions, and reactions showed it all  
"Subs obey, whatever the dominant wants"  
"No!" Aramis cried "No they don`t!, maybe they did centuries ago when we still thought the earth was flat!, but not now!, Subs, submit to the Dominant yes, but it is the Dominants job and purpose to care for the Sub, to make sure he or she is safe, happy, secure, and content, he or she has No Right to treat them as slaves nore to abuse them!"  
"But You............" d`Artagnan broke off biting his lip and looking away not keen to bring up the subject of his punishment though it was clear that was what he was thinking.

"We hurt you aswell, and maybe worse than Robert ever did" Athos said making d`Artagnan`s head snap back in shock "We thought you knew to use the safety word, even when Porthos ordered you not to speak, the safety word transends that and anything else!, it is the one word that a Sub may always use whenever he or she is in need or discomforted, if you had used it at anytime during that God forsaken night we would have stopped, we`d have found another more suitable punishment, something non physical, anything but make you frightend of us, anything but make you loose the baby"  
"That was`nt your fault" d`Artagnan whispered  
"We`ll never know if it was or not, but we`ll carry the blam for it, and for all the distress we`ve caused you" Aramis said reaching out and pushing a stray lock of hair behind d`Artagnan`s ear, the act made him flinch at first, then as Aramis held his hand still like to a frighten or timid animal, he slowly leaned into the touch "We never meant you to run from Mon chere, never meant for you to feel so afraid that you had to flee"  
"When we found that letter........." Porthos broke off shaking his head "Bein` shot in the gut could`nt have hurt more"  
"I`m sorry" d`Artagnan whispered  
"No, we`re sorry, we`re the ones that drove you to it" Athos stated "We are the ones at fault here not you", saddly d`Artagnan did`nt look like he totaly believed them, he did however allow himself to be shifted into a group snuggle, melting into Porthos large embrace, resting his head on the mans chest the sound of his heart comforting him while Athos and Aramis held his hands and wrapped about his sides, Aramis`s fingers trailing a pattern over his middle  
"What happens now?" d`Artagnan whispered  
"That depends on you sweetheart" Aramis said looking up at him through his fringe "We want you to come home with us, let us take care of you, get you healthy and strong again, make amends and try to rebuild our relationship, but..."  
"But it`s your decision" Athos said taking over "You can go to where ever you were planning on going, we won`t stop you or force you to come back to Paris with us, or you can come back with us and if you wish to you can live seperately from us, or with us but sleep in seperate rooms, it`s your choice and we will repsect it".

D`Artagnan looked at each of his dominants in turn trying to see the lie that might be being told him but found non, all of them hopeful he would come home with them, but prepared to let him go if he wished it.

America was a foolish idea, he knew that, once there he`d be lucky to find work, and more than likly thrown out once his condition was discovered, and as a pregnant lone sub he`d be prey to ever predatory dom in the country, end up far worse off than he`d been even when he`d been with Robert.

The thought of going home, the thought of maybe being able to put this past him and start afresh, it was tempting, more than tempting, but the constant nagging fear of that hellish night reoccuring still held him back  
"I`m sure Constance would have you stay with her again" Porthos put in "We`ll pay the rent and board you need`nt worry about that"  
"Porthos!" Athos scolded "He`s surposed to make up his own mind!"  
"I`m jus` sayin`!"  
"Or since Porthos will be in the dogs kennel Athos and I can take the spare bedroom and you can have our bed!" Aramis joked grunted when Porthos kicked his middle for him  
"We don`t have a kennel!" d`Artagnan laughed weakly but the first genuine smile in weeks appearing on his face  
"Ah he can sleep on the balcony with birds shitting on his head then!" Aramis offered this time avoiding the foot aimed at him  
"Or you and I can kick these idiots out and live in peace!" Athos said rolling his eyes at Porthos`s growling and Aramis childish laughter  
"I...I`d like to go home" d`Artagnan whispered feeling a huge weight lifting inside him, his Sub was delighted though his fear prickled  
"Then we`ll go home, and we`ll lay some ground rules, for all of us" Athos said with a warm smile "Non of us will touch you without your express permission or request, save in emergency situations you understand"  
"Of course" d`Artagnan agreed, if he`d been shot he would expect them to touch him to stop the bleeding for heavon sake  
"There will no physical punishment at all from now on, not spanking, slapping, caning, nothing of that nature, we`ll use a naughty step or silence or something like that" Athos said getting a nod from Porthos  
"As for our sleeping arangments they will also be on your terms, if you wish to sleep with us we`ll be more than happy, ecstatic in fact!, if you wish to sleep alone then you may do so, or to sleep with us but not be touched by us, we won`t make any advancement on you without your permission" Aramis said "And if you give it we will check with you that you are happy and enjoying it through out not just assume you are as we have in the past"  
"Also any punishment you wish for us endure for what we have done to you, we will" Porthos said  
"I don`t want you to be punished, not ever" d`Artagnan said quickly shaking his head "I want.............I don`t know what I want!, it`s so confusing!, I want to feel like I did before all this!, I want to go back to that and not have this have happened!"  
"if we could make that possible we would cherub, but sadly we can`t turn back time" Athos whispered taking d`Artagnan`s chin "We can only look to the future"

D`Artagnan nodded licking his lips and looking into Athos eyes "I`ve missed this" he admitted "I`ve missed you"  
"We`ve missed you too precious" Porthos rumbled from behind him "More than we can say"  
"Maybe we should take things a step at a time?" Aramis suggested "Each day as it comes?"  
"Sounds alright" d`Artagnan agreed, at that point someones stomach growled and after a moment Pothos rose to go and get some food from the land lord leaving Athos and Aramis to look after d`Artagnan.

They stayed two more days in La Harve, insisting d`Artagnan see a Doctor before they left so they knew he was fit to travel, Athos sent word to Treville, who they suspected would react like a Father to d`Artagnan whom he privately saw as another Son, and a protege, and proberly beat them around the heads for being incompetant fools!.

They took d`Artagnan home, making a steady and easy trip so as not to tire him, insisting on may breaks and not letting him ride when his sickness occured.  
On arriving back in Paris they went straight home, wanting d`Artagnan to get some rest before doing anything else.

Along the way they had discussed other rules, that d`Artagnan was`nt to be their House Wife, they would share responsability for the chores, though it was preffered that d`Artagnan cook since they`re skills were not overly great!, but they would clean and do the washing, not let him take all the work himself, and especially make sure he took it easy as his time grew closer.

While he opted to sleep in the spare room which was to become the nursery, d`Artagnan found himself unable to settle in the bed alone and meekly shuffled into the master bedroom where his dominants were sprawled over the bed, Porthos in an impossible position his head hanging off the pillow legs splayed out and mouth open in soft snores!, Aramis was using his middle as a pillow twitching and mumbling every so often!, curled up almost in a fetal position!.  
Athos was the only one awake, reading by the light of a single candle.  
He looked up with a smile when he saw d`Artagnan standing in the door way night shirt hanging off one shoulder, and hair mussed from the bed  
"You alright?" he asked  
"I.....can I sleep in here?" d`Artagnan asked hesitantly "With you I mean?"  
"Of course, come on in" Athos set his book down and actually got out of bed to make room for d`Artagnan to climb in without risking disturbing Porthos or Aramis  
"Alright?" he asked as d`Artagnan settled in between him and Porthos  
"I am now" d`Artagnan whispered burrowing down in the bed sheets and closing his eyes sleep taking him almost instantly, Athos remained awake looking over his fragile haunted lover, guilt still swirled in his stomach, not just for the miscarriage but for the punishment in general, would he ever be able to make up for that?, would d`Artagnan ever be able to look at them again and not feel fear?, had it been ruined for good?,  
"Shhhtop ttthhhinkin`" came Aramis`s sleepy voice "Sss`disturbin` me!"  
"I appologise!" Athos said sardonically "I`ll try to think quieter!"  
"Good!" Aramis said settling back down on his Porthos pillow!.

Smiling softly to himself Athos blew out the candle and settled himself down in the bed only having been laying down for a few moments when d`Artagnan suddenly moved and snuggled up into him nuzzling his chest and getting just about as close as he could.  
Athos froze for a second, after weeks of d`Artagnan avoiding contact to now openly seek it in sleep was both encouraging and confusing, deciding to take a chance Athos lay an arm about d`Artagnan`s shoulders and enveloped him in an embrace kissing his forehead before closing his eyes to sleep himself.

They awoke the next morning to sound of Porthos falling out of bed taking Aramis with him in a crash on the floor followed by a lot of cursing and groaning!  
"Gracefull as ever!" Athos grunted squinting at them but more preoccupied by the armfull of Gascon who was still snuggled into him and pearing sleepily over the covers at Aramis and Porthos who were scowling at each other, made all the more comical by Aramis`s hair being on end and Porthos having a pillow on his head!  
"We need a bigger bloody bed!" Porthos grumbled getting to his feet and stretching  
"If you slept in a normal position like a normal person instead of like a contortionist then we would`nt!" Aramis argued grumpily  
"Says he that sucks his thumb when he`s asleep and thinks no one notices!" Porthos shot back!, the crimson of Aramis`s cheeks could have rivaled a working girls skirts!  
"Why don`t you two go and get some breakfast for us?" Athos asked not wanting to leave the comfortable nest with d`Artagnan who did not seem inclined to be moving yet  
"Who died and made you boss!?" Aramis grumbled sloping off to do as he was told anyway while Porthos scratched his head and grinned "I see we have a stow away joined us in the night"  
"Missed you" d`Artagnan mumbled  
"Missed you too gorgeous" Porthos grinned leaning forward to kiss d`Artagnan then checked himself recalling the rules  
"I`ll go and help Aramis with breakfast" he said grabbing some breeches to cover his modesty leaving d`Artagnan to look to Athos for explaination  
"We said we would`nt touch you without permission or request" Athos reminded him  
"He could have asked" d`Artagnan said  
"But then you could have felt pressured to accept" Athos replied "We don`t want to pressure you, we want you to feel safe a happy and want for us to touch you not just accept it out of duty", d`Artagnan pressed his lips together nodding his head wondering if he`d feel secure enough to request being touched, or not find it too embaressing to ask  
"Maybe you can kiss me without asking?" he offered getting a raised eyebrow from Athos  
"I mean like on the cheek and such?"  
"Are you sure you`d be alright with that?" Athos questioned, d`Artagnan nodded hoping his features were convincing enough for Athos to believe him, "Alright" Athos agreed "Pecking on the cheek is permitted then"  
"And hugging?", it felt embaressing but he had missed being hugged, that gentle enveloping of strong protective arms and a warm body flush against his own  
"Hugs and pecks on the cheek" Athos clarrified jumping as he heard glass shattering downstairs followed by a volly of Spanish swearing! "And I`ll go and see what they`re doing before the kitchen gets decimated!" he dead panned, taking a chance he breifly kissed d`Artagnan cheek setting off down stairs to see what Aramis and Porthos were doing leaving the Gascon Sub to his thoughts.

For the first time in weeks d`Artagnan`s stomach did`nt feel heavy with worry and fear, butterflies of nervousness perhaps, and a tinge of hope, but not that dread, or exhaustion or misery, instead he felt like perhaps things could work out, it was`nt going to simply go back to normal over night, it would take time to build trust again, time for him to want more than brief contact with his doms, sex was out of the question at present, but just the thought that maybe he would feel secure enough for that again one day was enough to bring a smile to his face, and keep him smiling as the three dominants came back with a half hazard breakfast, Aramis and Porthos playfully arguing and Athos just rolling his eyes at them as they set down the tray and each gave him brief but gentle kisses on the cheek handing him a glass of milk and a bowl of porridge laced with honey and cream  
"Alright?" Athos asked  
"Yeah" d`Artagnan replied honestly "I think I am".

End of Love the way you lie


End file.
